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Sex or Making Love? We've passed the marker by a lot but i am doubly glad because i can finally say that some nut got here from a GoLYTLY search, whoo hoo! anyway, i am bleeding but less crampy so that's good. I am glad that it finally came. i hate waiting for my period, I always get paranoid that I am pregnant if i don't see it on thursday but it's cool. It's coming in fine and crampy as always. yay. And of course, i have no weed and I have to ride for several hours in a car with Jewboy. yeah, i'm scared too. If he could just abstain from drinking soda constantly so that we could make this drive without ten million roadside stops for his pissing I could deal. That's how I drive. you don't eat. you don't drink. you drive. you get there quicker and have fun sooner. but whatever. his driving in general scares me but the fact that he's always peeing is just fucking annoying. grr...I am gonna be SO fun today. Yesterday sucked too. spk got fucked over at the DMV because his insurer wrote that his policy didn't start until the end of the month so they couldn't renew his plates after waiting half an hour to get through 8 people. Very annoying. after work we went out and saw his mom, which was all right once I got over the smell of death. may god save me from a home! then we had to do a quick bout of shopping, which turned out to be a long bout, and we came home really tired. or at least i was really tired. I was also rather emotional, damn estrogen, so sex didn't go really well. I wanted to make love, have some long foreplay, just kind of work myself into it because I wanted to have sex but I was tired and stressed so it was going to take me awhile. I tried to express this with comments on how nice his kissing was and how I liked snuggling and playing under the sheets. He started taking it too fast though once he got hard and I decided to let it roll. My cunt burned from the yeast infection so I asked for lube and then it burned from that. I tried getting into it and I started to enjoy it but I wasn't really turned on. I was kind of upset because I really wanted the special time and attention with him rather than pounding hard sex but I had a hard time saying it. Hell, I have a hard time even writing it cause now all the estrogen is making me cry. stupid estrogen. I know that he loves me though and I him, so it's not the end of the world. He enjoyed the sex and I apologized for not being able to get into it. I was glad though when it was over because i could wipe out the burning hole that was my cunt and at least snuggle with him. It wasn't completely what I wanted, I wanted to make love, but it comforted me. I just felt shitty about the entire incident and I still do because it's rare that i don't get into sex but it was just a shitty day for both of us in general and when i was feeling sexual we didn't have time to attend to it. Anyway, spk I love you dearly. i know you know that. If you want me to, i will take this down but I am sure that the world knows that you are normally a lovely hard thrusting stallion that keeps me coming and coming. he was in that form last night too, folks, i was just in a more female place where I wanted sex to be a loving comforting goodbye sort of a thing. I just couldn't communicate it correctly. Maybe I will get another shot before I leave at lunch today. :) Argghhh it's almost eleven. I still got to write this up in my paper journal and somehow work through the daily quota. I told myself that it isn't the end of the world if i can't do it but I want to push myself to try. I have been doing pretty well with it, although I am scared that it will be too long, but I guess I will find that out when i finish. Daphne |