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mini-rant It's Wednesday and I have nothing interesting to say. I just wanted to let people know that I don't know what I'm doing and I'm terribly confused about life. I hate lying around the house because I don't feel useful, even when I'm working on my little projects. My car door is broken, which is minor, but bugs me because I have to use the passenger door to open the driver's door making me look like a retard if I decide to venture out into public. I'm also pissed that I can't seem to get hired, even at the shit jobs. I'm going broke, lending money, suing to get my money back, and generally wishing I could sell something EVEN ass these days. I don't want to go back into escorting though. I've decided that. I'm just scared to wait through the last month before my audition without any work. I don't want to get an office job though and have to leave that in three weeks. So, I'm just farting around doing nothing, listening to advice to build my own company, and wishing the time would pass. That or I could just make up my mind. I can't though as my mind keeps flip flopping. I want something I can't have and I wish I could just write for a living, but I can't. I wish I knew my direction, like everyone else in the world, but I don't. So, I'm lying around feeling horribly inadequate to the rest of the world in every way, wishing I could sleep until something happens. something important. Oh well, at least I heard from those guys in Rockwood. Maybe I'll get a job and some footage sometime soon. daphne |