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come on Ohio!!! Okay, we're all waiting to see who carries Ohio this morning. It's all about Ohio. I'm hoping Kerry takes it, because if he doesn't I'll be down there protesting my heart out. The voting was really fucked up with huge lines, not enough booths, and last minute provisional votes. On top of this, they closed the polls there EARLY at 7:30!! That is total bullshit and if we lose the election I hope to GOD some of you will protest with me. I cannot stand for another four years of the jackass we have now. Anyway, I watched the results come in as long as I could. Sadly, they gave me a stress headache from hell so I went to bed early. I don't know why my brain started thumping like that, but it really hurt so I gave up trying to stay up. In terms of the Michigan proposals, I'm glad to see that Kwami won't have access to the school board and that we can vote on incoming casinos. I am, however, a bit pissed that Prop 2 passed because I thought we were a little more progressive than that. Oh well, it seems Michigan has lost any chance of allowing gay marriage thanks to this mini-DOMA AGAIN!!! Arrgghhh...if we had civil unions I wouldn't mind so much, but people really shouldn't have a say on who gets to marry whom. That's bullshit. I know it's a legal institution that's being protected, but I think it's for the wrong reasons. Straights need to get over themselves and realize that just because same sex couples marry that doesn't mean they'll start buttfucking in the bathroom. In other news, I might have a realish job as a caretaker for the elderly. I applied yesterday and ran into this kid I went to school with since 4th grade. Turns out, his mom would be my boss! She doesn't remember me, but that's okay. My interview is Friday but they really like me so I'm not worried there. I am a little concerned that I signed papers stating that they could both pre-screen and do random drug tests on me though. I'm cleaning out as much as possible right now, but I'm hoping that they trust me enough not to attempt it. I talked to Nate (old schoolchum) about it quietly and he claimed that they rarely do randoms but they might do a pre-screen. I think I'll survive. As long as I don't come to work high I should be fine. The pay isn't great, I might pursue the medical billing training later for that, but I'll be giving something back and the hours are super flexible. So, it might work out, we'll see. I am tired of porn though. Tired of being jerked around and not taken seriously. Tired of driving my body to an ideal I doubt I can get near. Tired of wishing for the body that can do what my slutty mind wants to do: be a superstar. So, I'm learning to accept that I won't ever be a big name, or any name for that matter, in porn. I know if I keep plugging away I might get a few more offers, and I will pursue Wisconsin still, but I feel stuck. It's also doing a huge number on my self-esteem because I'll never be pretty enough to grab someone's attention and that hurts. Hurts like hell. So I'll try and sell something else, my art, my writing, my mind. and, because I promised Dan, here's the best metaphor Dan created last night for the election. In 2000, Bush was the giant turd that got shoved up America's pussy. America then developed a yeast infection known as the War on Iraq. Now we need Kerry, a giant douche, to clean up the mess. I hope he has connections with monistat!! Daphne |